How to get a raise

While walking into Walmart to get Christmas gifts ~

Me: You each get $20 to spend on your sisters.

S: That's all?  Not $25?

Me: Hey, it was going to be only $10 each.

R: Mom, you need to get paid more. You have, like, three jobs.

Me: No. I have one job.

R: But you work for two companies.

Me: That's true.

R: You should start slacking off.  Then when the boss comes up and says, "You've been slacking on the job." You can say, "Well, you've been slacking on my paycheck!"

God, I love my kids!