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5/31/12
June Photo a Day Challenge
Last month's Photo-a-Day Challenge was so much fun I thought I'd do another one for this month.
If you'd like to follow along, here's the list ~
If you'd like to follow along, here's the list ~
Tom the Talker
You ever get one of those people on the phone, and you just know, if you ever meet them in person, they're going to be huge talkers?
I'm sure you know the type.
I met one yesterday.
He called and said he was Tom from the home show. He had talked to me about possibly getting an entry door.
I had no clue who the hell he was.
Then he started talking about when he worked at an envelope factory.
I kid you not. An envelope factory.
He was calling to get directions to the showroom, but would stray off topic or try to relate the topic back to working in the envelope factory.
I knew, once he was in the showroom, he was going to talk.
And talk.
And talk.
I was right.
And most of it was relating work at the envelope factory to whatever we began talking about!
It was very painful. I spent about an hour with this guy. (Or less. I'm not really sure. It felt like an hour.) We managed to figure out what frame style would look best with the architecture of the house, and that was about it.
I think that was about it. I kept getting distracted by the fact he worked in an envelope factory.
And mentioned it every ten minutes.
All he kept talking about was the envelope factory!
It was like I was suddenly in a horrible CBS sitcom.
I kept waiting to hear the laugh track.
And in case any of you are wondering ~
Tom worked at an envelope factory.
(He managed to say envelope factory probably ten times more than I just did in this post.)
I'm sure you know the type.
I met one yesterday.
He called and said he was Tom from the home show. He had talked to me about possibly getting an entry door.
I had no clue who the hell he was.
Then he started talking about when he worked at an envelope factory.
I kid you not. An envelope factory.
He was calling to get directions to the showroom, but would stray off topic or try to relate the topic back to working in the envelope factory.
I knew, once he was in the showroom, he was going to talk.
And talk.
And talk.
I was right.
And most of it was relating work at the envelope factory to whatever we began talking about!
It was very painful. I spent about an hour with this guy. (Or less. I'm not really sure. It felt like an hour.) We managed to figure out what frame style would look best with the architecture of the house, and that was about it.
I think that was about it. I kept getting distracted by the fact he worked in an envelope factory.
And mentioned it every ten minutes.
All he kept talking about was the envelope factory!
It was like I was suddenly in a horrible CBS sitcom.
I kept waiting to hear the laugh track.
And in case any of you are wondering ~
Tom worked at an envelope factory.
(He managed to say envelope factory probably ten times more than I just did in this post.)
5/30/12
5/29/12
5/28/12
5/27/12
5/26/12
Shitty conversation
Earlier while at Mom's ~
Jan: Just about all fruit makes you poop.
Me: Except bananas. They make you constipated.
R: So monkeys never go poop??!!
Jan: Just about all fruit makes you poop.
Me: Except bananas. They make you constipated.
R: So monkeys never go poop??!!
Professionalism
The owner of Allied Gate and Orbit Cleaning has decided to step up and become actively involved in both companies, working with everyone on ways to improve our business in sales and customer service.
He has invested in a training course for all sales members, and is working on several other things to improve on our customer service.
Right now, 99% of sales for Orbit Cleaning, are through Groupon campaigns. One of the things he has implemented is to get customer emails when an appointment is set, and sending them a Customer Letter explaining what techniques the technician will perform while in their home, as well as how to prep the rooms for their arrival. (Can you tell I've recited this several hundred times?)
It's a great idea, since many customers don't read all the fine print when purchasing a Groupon, or take the time to ask, and this lets them know exactly what they will be getting.
Anyway, the owner carbon copies me on a couple emails he sent out last week and I was a little shocked, appalled and embarrassed these emails were sent from the owner of the company.
First, he puts in the subject line of the email "Orbit Cleaning". That's it. Nothing else that would give the receiver any idea what this email is.
Second, he puts in the body of the email "open attachment". Exactly like that. No capitalization. No punctuation. No salutation. He did add his name and Orbit phone number in the signature.
The attachment was in a Word document, rather than a PDF, so not everyone may be able to open it. Again, not very professional.
I opened the attachment.
This is what he was sending out to clients we are hoping to become repeat customers, or or who will refer us to others ~
He has invested in a training course for all sales members, and is working on several other things to improve on our customer service.
Right now, 99% of sales for Orbit Cleaning, are through Groupon campaigns. One of the things he has implemented is to get customer emails when an appointment is set, and sending them a Customer Letter explaining what techniques the technician will perform while in their home, as well as how to prep the rooms for their arrival. (Can you tell I've recited this several hundred times?)
It's a great idea, since many customers don't read all the fine print when purchasing a Groupon, or take the time to ask, and this lets them know exactly what they will be getting.
Anyway, the owner carbon copies me on a couple emails he sent out last week and I was a little shocked, appalled and embarrassed these emails were sent from the owner of the company.
First, he puts in the subject line of the email "Orbit Cleaning". That's it. Nothing else that would give the receiver any idea what this email is.
Second, he puts in the body of the email "open attachment". Exactly like that. No capitalization. No punctuation. No salutation. He did add his name and Orbit phone number in the signature.
The attachment was in a Word document, rather than a PDF, so not everyone may be able to open it. Again, not very professional.
I opened the attachment.
This is what he was sending out to clients we are hoping to become repeat customers, or or who will refer us to others ~
Click for larger view.
Aaakkkk!!! I could not send this out to clients. ("Dear Customer's"???) It looks like an 8th grader put it together from a template downloaded from Microsoft's website. (Which, for all I know, is exactly what it is!) Plus, at the very bottom it says we use PayPal.
We don't.
Not good to have that in a letter as a payment option.
We don't.
Not good to have that in a letter as a payment option.
So, from now on, I send out the emails where I put in the subject "Orbit Cleaning Customer Letter". No surprises what they're getting in their in-box. And I address the client in the body of the email.
Click for larger view.
In my opinion, it looks 100% better and much more professional. I did change the email a little to say "We look forward to seeing you on (date and arrival time), and thank you for choosing Orbit Cleaning."
And I attach this for them ~
Click for larger view.
Not only does it look much more professional, but it addresses anyone who uses our services, and adds that little personal touch by being addressed directly to the client.
After seeing this, I thought maybe this is why they keep our "VP of Sales"! LOL
5/25/12
I'm late! I'm late!
Funny conversation this morning ~
I was working on my laptop in the livingroom, and S was sleeping on the couch when she suddenly sits up and says:
S: Oh. man! Is it 5:00?
Me: Actually it's 5:54.
S: Crap! I didn't know it was 5:00!! I am so late for work!!
She then runs into her room to get dressed in record time and I head off the the bathroom. While there I'm thinking, "The mall doesn't open for another 3-4 hours. How the hell can she be late?"
S: (Now dressed for work) Hurry, Mom. I'm going to be late. It's now 6:04!! Let's go!!!
Me: Why do you need to be at work now?
S: (Interrupting me) I was supposed to be there at SIX!!!
Me: Yeah, but why? The mall doesn't open for like 3-4 hours.
S: WHAT???? Isn't it 6:00 at night?
Me: No. It's morning.
S: Oh, shit! My manager is going to think I'm crazy. I thought I slept through the whole day.
I was working on my laptop in the livingroom, and S was sleeping on the couch when she suddenly sits up and says:
S: Oh. man! Is it 5:00?
Me: Actually it's 5:54.
S: Crap! I didn't know it was 5:00!! I am so late for work!!
She then runs into her room to get dressed in record time and I head off the the bathroom. While there I'm thinking, "The mall doesn't open for another 3-4 hours. How the hell can she be late?"
S: (Now dressed for work) Hurry, Mom. I'm going to be late. It's now 6:04!! Let's go!!!
Me: Why do you need to be at work now?
S: (Interrupting me) I was supposed to be there at SIX!!!
Me: Yeah, but why? The mall doesn't open for like 3-4 hours.
S: WHAT???? Isn't it 6:00 at night?
Me: No. It's morning.
S: Oh, shit! My manager is going to think I'm crazy. I thought I slept through the whole day.
5/24/12
5/23/12
5/22/12
Weird conversation
I can't remember what sparked this conversation, but it's not one you have everyday with your kids.
Or anyone for that matter....
S: Do you think you could shoot someone?
Me: No. But I think I could probably stab them.
S: Oh, no you couldn't. Once you saw the gush of blood you'd faint. Not to mention the squishy, gushy sound it'll make as you thrust the knife into the body. (Someone has either 1. been watching too many gory movies, or 2. has secrets I don't want to know about.)
Me: Yeah. You're probably right. But I definitely couldn't shoot someone in the head. There's no way I could stand to see blood and brain-mater splattered all over.
S: Yeah. That's be gross. Reminds me of Pulp Fiction. I love that movie. (She then quotes a line from the movie that I can't remember for the life of me.)
Me: Ya know, I could totally be like Hawkeye in The Avengers and shoot someone in the eye with an arrow!
Or anyone for that matter....
S: Do you think you could shoot someone?
Me: No. But I think I could probably stab them.
S: Oh, no you couldn't. Once you saw the gush of blood you'd faint. Not to mention the squishy, gushy sound it'll make as you thrust the knife into the body. (Someone has either 1. been watching too many gory movies, or 2. has secrets I don't want to know about.)
Me: Yeah. You're probably right. But I definitely couldn't shoot someone in the head. There's no way I could stand to see blood and brain-mater splattered all over.
S: Yeah. That's be gross. Reminds me of Pulp Fiction. I love that movie. (She then quotes a line from the movie that I can't remember for the life of me.)
Me: Ya know, I could totally be like Hawkeye in The Avengers and shoot someone in the eye with an arrow!
5/21/12
5/20/12
5/19/12
5/18/12
5/17/12
5/16/12
5/15/12
5/14/12
5/13/12
Earlier this afternoon
Sean: Oh, look! The duck is back. And she's with the male one. Or maybe it's a different one. I think it's a different girl duck. No. It's a different boy duck. Wait. Maybe it's the same one. Is it the same one?
Me: How would I know. They all look the same to me. He didn't have any distinguishing birthmarks or tattoos.
5/12/12
5/11/12
5/10/12
5 Very Important Questions NOT to Ask When Scheduling a Carpet Cleaning
As some of you may know, my current job with Allied Gate Co. is a designer. I design custom iron doors, gates, railing, etc.
But that's not my only job.
Or the only company I work for.
The owner of Allied also owns a huge company that repairs mining equipment, and a carpet cleaning company, Orbit Cleaning Service.
I also work for Orbit.
For both companies, it's my responsibility to do all the scheduling.
And by all, I mean anything and everything that needs to be scheduled for either company, I handle it.
And I must say, I'm pretty damn good at it!
As the one and only scheduler, I've had my share of stupid questions, most on the Orbit Cleaning side. So, as a public service, I thought I'd share five of the top questions you should NOT to ask when scheduling a carpet cleaning.
1. How big is my_________ (fill in the blank with any room in the house)?
Hold on, let me check. (I have no clue. I'm not in your house!)
2. Do you have any earlier appointments? Maybe something for tomorrow?
I said; "My NEXT AVAILABLE opening is_________." (NOT tomorrow) So, no. I don't have anything available for tomorrow.
3. Can you give me an exact time when the technician will be at my house? (All appointments are given in 2 hour arrival blocks.)
No. Haven't you ever had any other services or contract work done? (Think cable, gas & electric company. They give you a "Sometime between 8am & 5pm" window.) Sometimes these things take 1 hour, sometimes 3. The best I can do is have the tech call when he's on the way.
4. How do you measure the rooms?
Heel to toe. Isn't that how everyone measures things?
5. Do I have to be there for the cleaning?
We aren't doing this for free, now are we, Sweetheart?
But that's not my only job.
Or the only company I work for.
The owner of Allied also owns a huge company that repairs mining equipment, and a carpet cleaning company, Orbit Cleaning Service.
I also work for Orbit.
For both companies, it's my responsibility to do all the scheduling.
And by all, I mean anything and everything that needs to be scheduled for either company, I handle it.
And I must say, I'm pretty damn good at it!
As the one and only scheduler, I've had my share of stupid questions, most on the Orbit Cleaning side. So, as a public service, I thought I'd share five of the top questions you should NOT to ask when scheduling a carpet cleaning.
1. How big is my_________ (fill in the blank with any room in the house)?
Hold on, let me check. (I have no clue. I'm not in your house!)
2. Do you have any earlier appointments? Maybe something for tomorrow?
I said; "My NEXT AVAILABLE opening is_________." (NOT tomorrow) So, no. I don't have anything available for tomorrow.
3. Can you give me an exact time when the technician will be at my house? (All appointments are given in 2 hour arrival blocks.)
No. Haven't you ever had any other services or contract work done? (Think cable, gas & electric company. They give you a "Sometime between 8am & 5pm" window.) Sometimes these things take 1 hour, sometimes 3. The best I can do is have the tech call when he's on the way.
4. How do you measure the rooms?
Heel to toe. Isn't that how everyone measures things?
5. Do I have to be there for the cleaning?
We aren't doing this for free, now are we, Sweetheart?
5/9/12
5/8/12
5/7/12
5/6/12
This morning
Sean: Did you get me any coffee creamer?
Me: No. You didn't tell me you were out. You know, if you guys don't tell me when we're out of things I don't eat, I won't know to buy them.
He makes a cup of coffee with milk and a load of sugar.
A few minutes later comes back into the kitchen and dumps out 1/2 a cup of coffee.
Me: Can't drink your coffee without creamer, huh?
Sean: No. I need creamer so it's sweet. And you didn't get me any.
S: Be a man, Dad! Drink your coffee black. Strong and black!
Me: Yeah! Listen to your daughter!
Me: No. You didn't tell me you were out. You know, if you guys don't tell me when we're out of things I don't eat, I won't know to buy them.
He makes a cup of coffee with milk and a load of sugar.
A few minutes later comes back into the kitchen and dumps out 1/2 a cup of coffee.
Me: Can't drink your coffee without creamer, huh?
Sean: No. I need creamer so it's sweet. And you didn't get me any.
S: Be a man, Dad! Drink your coffee black. Strong and black!
Me: Yeah! Listen to your daughter!
5/5/12
5/4/12
5/3/12
5/2/12
5/1/12
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